Humor Column

By Barbara McLay, University of South Florida

Sometimes You Have to Laugh

I am an apprentice teacher in an alternative high school working with students who have been expelled from their previous schools. I gave students in American history a list of strongly negative vocabulary words to use in writing a narrative about the Pequot and the Puritans. When a six-foot, hefty, multi-pierced, scary-looking kid handed me his paper, I did my best to not burst out laughing. He had written about a "friendly massacre."
Elizabeth Tran—San Diego, CA

My friend Amanda, when apprentice teaching a high school literature class, assigned silent reading to begin class. Obviously not reading, John, the class clown, was leaning his chair against the wall and had his eyes closed. Thinking he was sleeping, Amanda said, “John, set your chair down." He ignored her, so she walked toward him. As soon as she got near enough to touch him, he suddenly set his chair upright and opened his eyes. Not being experienced with sophomoric pranks, Amanda shrieked and set the class into fits of laughter. The white parts of John’s eyes were a vivid blue. He had poured blue food coloring into his eyes.
Elizabeth Tran—San Diego, CA

Comment on Student’s Final Evaluation Paper: When I realized that the instructor had written the textbook, I took it more seriously. It is nice to know that you are working with the author when dealing with such tedious material.
Barbara McLay

Not Yet Perfectly Fluent

Excerpts from Students’ Papers

Many women are not equipped to give birth to a child. (I believe he meant not mentally or emotionally equipped, but not saying so made me laugh!)

While one person believes that their view is the absolute truth, another sees that person as idiotic and maybe even uneducated. (I loved that to this writer, being uneducated seems a more egregious fault than being idiotic.)

Contributions

Please share with us your funny classroom experiences or faux pas from students’ papers. Send contributions to bmclay@cchd.usf.edu. Please put “LCN Humor” as the subject.

Questions or comments? Contact the author at bmclay@cchd.usf.edu.